car-free single parenting

My wife was out of town last weekend and left me with the youngsters (3yo and 1yo) for three days. I learned the first day that I would be a happier person if I gave up on any hopes of pursuing my usual home activities, like reading, fooling around on the computer, making pipe bombs, etc. While the kids were awake, we spent most of the time allocating toys, cleaning up messes, and preparing snacks and meals. We had a lot of fun, actually, and nobody got seriously injured.

We did some minor grocery shopping on Saturday. Between a rear child seat and a Burley trailer-car-seat combo, we managed OK. Had the weather been worse, or if we needed a larger load of groceries, or if the kids weren't well-behaved, or if anything else went wrong, the simple grocery run could have been a major ordeal. As it was, the excursion was challenging enough to carry the little one (23 pounds of Real Man), plus groceries, and keep the older one from running into traffic while I fiddled with my lock. I received some criticism from a morbidly overweight redneck-type cigarette-smoking SUV-driver who semi-incoherently expressed his belief that my bicycle lifestyle is endangering my children (strikingly similar to another encounter from a month ago). Admittedly, it would have been easier to take the car, but what a waste of an opportunity to get the kids out for fresh air on a beautiful Fall day.

I had this single-parenting duty for just three days, during which time I didn't have to go out and earn a living. I'm happy to be in a position to have coworkers who can cover for me when I can't be at work, and it doesn't affect my paycheck - one of the benefits of being self-employed. I'm not sure how single parents who don't have similar work arrangements manage this, especially those who don't have extended families who share the childcare duties.

Speaking of families, my mom came over for a visit on Sunday, ostensibly to help me with the kids. We got to talking about the presidential campaign and somehow that led to her asking me about my opinions regarding alternative energy. I told her that I thought that the concept of an alternative to petroleum was preposterous, which I expressed with an edgy cantankerousness that surprised me when it came out. I struggled to regain my usual good-nature and composure as I poked holes in all the currently popular energy conjuring schemes that she mentioned. When I was through denouncing the concept of natural gas as a replacement for oil, my mom seemed incredulous when she asked, "So what's gonna happen? Will we have to change our lifestyle?" Her question has an obvious answer, but it still made me think. It's not likely that some singular event will be the switch and a booming voice announces: TODAY YOU CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE. No, society-scale changes take at least a generation, and during the transition, it's hard to see that a transition is happening. Only when we compare the way things were way back when to the way that they are now do we see that something significant happened. The most likely scenario is that most people will notice (or have already noticed) that their senses of entitlement and expectation require continual adjustment in a downward direction. Ok, I guess I can't buy a new car this year. Ok, I guess I can't sell my house at an enormous profit. Ok, I guess I can't always buy the best gourmet food. Ok, I guess I can live without the deluxe cable package. Ok, I guess I can get by without health insurance for awhile. Ok, I guess I can't pay my kids' college tuition. Ok, I guess I can't retire as early as my father did. Unfortunately, these realizations are likely to come only through the lens of credit cards that were maxed out in pursuit of unrealistic expectations.