evolution of a fatalist

Over the years, I've experimented with various reactions to stories like this.

Dennis Dumm commuted by bike every day and followed the rules of the road, his girlfriend said. The driver won't be cited.

In a number of ways, I can relate to Dennis Dumm. He was the same age as me, interested in bicycle commuting, getting free of his car, a photography enthusiast, etc. In the old days, I would have expressed my reaction to this tragic incident with a mix of surprise/dismay and trumped-up outrage. I may have joined some of the more reactionary types on local forums in calling for the truck driver's head.

But now I look at this story with a more jaded eye. The truck driver wasn't cited for his likeliest violation of traffic statute, failure to yield, which shouldn't be surprising to anybody who follows stories of this type. I would submit that the truck driver will have to deal with his own sense of guilt, which is a larger penalty than some trivial traffic citation. But blame can also be heaped on city policymakers and street engineers for creating a bicycling facility that is commonly described by people who use it as "treacherous". Perhaps, also, Dumm could have selected a safer route or been more cognizant of the heavily loaded truck that was turning into his lane. Frankly, I'm done with the blame game. Without assigning blame, I can concoct any number of scenarios that would have changed the factors in play just slightly, and would result in a different outcome. Sort of a butterfly effect kind of logic. Why blame a truck driver, city engineers, or the cyclist's technique, when we can chalk up the unfortunate convergence to meteorology, how long the driver in front of the dump truck spent eating breakfast, or the inflation pressure of Dumm's bicycle tires? Add or subtract 5 seconds, and it might all be different, and Dumm would have lived to ride again, unaware of how close he was to being dead.

Rather than trying to identify a singular villain, who can conveniently be held to account for this irreversible tragedy, I take this story as a constructive learning experience. I'm lucky to have learned the lesson of big trucks turning into my lane through a close call or two, but the Dennis Dumm story really drives the point home. Be aware, ride conservatively, maintain escape routes in traffic, etc. Beyond this detail of cycling in traffic is a greater lesson. As the economist John Maynard Keynes famously noted, in the long run, we're all dead. Whether we get hit by a truck, contract an inexplicable terminal cancer, or live to 100 in fine health before dying peacefully in our sleep, there are no guarantees, and no entitlements. Being alive exposes us to all manner of risks to life and limb, and none of us are getting out alive.